Any day now, the Eagles are going to announce a major contract extension for coach Andy Reid. We can only hope the news is accompanied by a laugh track.
Someday soon, a national media figure will proclaim that Donovan McNabb is one of the best quarterbacks in the NFL. Those who have watched him for more than a decade here will provide their own laugh track for that one.
And now I have an announcement. No longer do I want both of these maddening men to leave. No, I’ve lowered my expectations. Now, I just want one to leave. I don’t even care which one, as long as one of them is gone at the end of this ridiculous season.
In Sunday’s brutal loss to San Diego, it was Reid’s turn to antagonize us with his usual formula for disaster: a slow start, a flurry of special-teams penalties, hideous red-zone play-calling, astounding short-yardage failures and wasted timeouts followed by insulting explanations.
McNabb actually received praise for his monster numbers. Only a cynic like me would point out that McNabb was 4-for-12 with a puny 22 yards on plays inside the red zone. And only an ingrate like me would mention that McNabb was effective only against a prevent defense.
The Eagles would tell you that I am no expert on the complicated game of football, and they would be right. But I am the closest thing to an expert when it comes to Eagles fans — 20 years of talking to them every day on WIP is a powerful credential — and I can tell you that they have had enough.
Either Reid or McNabb should go — for the good of the team, for the sanity of the city. The best guess right now is that McNabb will be the sacrificial lamb once the Eagles lock themselves in with a new deal for Reid. That’s fine with me because it represents a much-needed change, although it’s more logical to get a new coach. People who think Reid is still performing at a high level aren’t paying attention.
Did they see the coach roll out Eldra Buckley on a key third-and-1 play in the second quarter? Did they see Michael Vick attempt one pass, a wounded duck behind DeSean Jackson? Did they see Reid run 13 times and pass 55 against the 26th-ranked run defense?
I could go on, but you get the point. Reid is terrible pretty much all of the time now. McNabb is just terrible when it matters most. Together, they are football poison. The Eagles’ hierarchy must see that by now. Don’t they?
Goodbye, Andy. Or goodbye, Donovan. Just go, one of you. Please.
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