Worst of Craigslist: Full moon edition, with a side of extra crazy

Usually I try and draw together Craigslist posts with a theme, but this week defied categorization. The posts are a veritable hodgepodge of crazy.

From serious calls for protests of the treatment of haunted house workers to pretentious social clubs for small dogs, weird hipster-speak to Occupy tent fetishes, it must’ve been a full moon … all week.

It’s similar to a Tupperware party, but instead of spending money, you’re scamming all your friends to pawn their extra jewelry.

Social events for small dogs are borderline obnoxious, but then you had to go make the program name “The small dog” in French? Hells. No.

This is going to be my new pick-up line.

That old lady in the balloon hat doesn’t look thrilled about finding her inner child.

I was wondering when these were going to start coming in.

You’re DDF now … don’t you wanna keep it that way?

I know that bucket hats, Larry David faces and kale smoothies are at the top of my list of turn-ons.

Because there are so many hippies in Lansdale. Also, I’m pretty sure if you called the police to report a hippie, they would laugh you back to Middle America or wherever the fuck your mindset hails from.

I would love to hear the story behind this one.

Aside from the fact that “paid volunteering” is an oxymoron, this is just fucking weird.

“Family Feud” sounds like every Christmas at my mom’s house and “You for President” does make me cry … though the tears are not of joy.

So is he being supported by the Nazi party, or by the Al Sharpton and “Louis Faracon” contingent? You really have to pick one to bitch about.

This is an attitude I can get behind.

Leave Freddy out of this. But definitely occupy the haunted houses.

I can see why – this post is making me depressed.

Addicted to love is a Robert Palmer song, not a legitimate medical diagnosis.

Huh. Was this in the psyche ward, by any chance?

Once again, bookies advertising on Craigslist? Really?

I would like to say something. Three words, actually. Nauseating. Overcompensating. Douchebag.

Cars and Christ. How patriotic.

What? Is this some kind of human trafficking ad?

Yeah, fuck that Craig guy!

There should be a game called “Lumberjack or Hipster?”

I would love to see a forehead that looks like it’s full of gizzards. What an attractive visual.

I, on the other hand, do think you’re crazy for “knowing” trees have souls.

And you didn’t find the “staring in the window” of the gym part creepy in the least?

A) I knew that hotel was shady and B) A “fuckfest” is probably not the best place to start a lasting relationship.

Out of all the pictures you could post to entice, why a urinal?

Didn’t realize the 30th Street Station bathroom was such a hotspot.

Seven hundo? Weirdo dancing? Are you a hipster or a Valley Girl?