Worst of Craigslist: Hurricane Weather Weirdness

Something about extreme weather brings the crazy out. First, we had post-earthquake requests for make-out sessions and get-togethers. Now, as Hurricane Irene moves up the coast towards Philly, there’s a whole new slew of weather-related weirdness.

Weather crazies can be broken down into roughly three groups.

There’s the horndogs. They are looking for any excuse to post pictures of their junk and meet strangers for sex. I guess weather is as good a reason as any.

Then you have the opportunists. They use natural disasters as an excuse to promote their business:

To market shit that’s been sitting in their basement for years but is finally useful:

And to have sales with timely names.

The most hardcore opportunists, like this guy, who actually go out and buy tons of shit they know people will need and stores will sell out of, mark it up and wait for panic and desperation to set in.

Then you have the conspiracy-theorists who equate the movement of storm systems and tectonic plates with apocalypse or the fulfillment of other strange ideologies (like, damn, a hurricane AND a foreign invasion?)

These two guys are probably going to drown.

And, of course, there are those that don’t need weather excuses to be weird.

This is how Roxborough dudes try to get laid. Give the guy some slack, though, I’m sure he doesn’t run into Black Women often ’round those parts.

Of course you’re non-judgmental. You’re a freaking Ukelele meet-up.

Glad you have this figured all out, dude, though I’m not sure how a fence around Mexico would force immigrants to learn English.

Who doesn’t love a confident urinator?

Thank you for sharing such intimate information about yourself.

I don’t know about everybody else, but the only people I feel the need to take care of financially are myself and my possible hypothetical future progeny.

Because this whole post just SCREAMS “soccer mom get-together.”

Just what I need! Advice on eczema and allergies from someone who can’t even spell either condition!

Big fans of Ghostbusters?

Because the Victorian Era wasn’t wealth-based at all. Or horrifically socially restrictive and sexually repressed or anything.

Pretty sure this is a one-sided relationship, buddy. And that relationship is called “stalking.”

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